Most people aren't doing this one, because it's quite a personal question, but I am going to do it, and hope that you will be able to empathize with me, all you mothers out there.
We moved to Flagstaff after Izzy was born. Like, RIGHT after. Like we practically got KICKED out of our Cedar City house and was homeless for a while. John lived in a hotel, and I lived with my mom for like 2 weeks, with my month old and my 2 year old. NOT IDEAL. It was stressful bad. Izzy was my first experience with post pardom depression. I SO lucked out with Lily, and didn't have it.
So you take moving with a newborn, post pardom depression, packing, unpacking, and having no friends and no social outlets whatsoever, and you ARE going to crack.
It was naptime, I was SO TIRED and I'm sure depressed and feeling like I wanted to crawl into bed and die. Izzy was sleeping like a good baby, for once. Lily usually slept 2-3 hours at the time, but not this day, oh no. She kept getting up and waking me up out of my almost sleep, which is the most frustrating thing in the world. I eventually freaked out. I picked her up by her shoulders and yelled at her in her face that she WAS going to sleep and that she's better not get up again or I'd spank her. Something along those lines. I just remember, holding her up to my face and yelling at her. She was 2 years old. Now that I look back I realize that my behavior when we moved was very selfish. It never even occurred to me that SHE was adjusting to a new home, no friends AND a new baby. I did nothing to make any transition easier for her. I was having to hard of a time myself. Luckily, it appeared that she adjusted to Izzy very well from all of my pre-birth preparation.
I know that it's 'okay' that I did this, as long as I realized that it was wrong, and never do it again. Which I do. I completely do. I know that parents do worse, I know that I could've done worse in my state. But the memory of holding my sweet little 2 year old up in the air to yell in her face will be something that will always haunt me forever.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Day 23- What is something you crave.
This is NOT going to be a one object answer.
1. Ice Cream
2. Indian Food
(now I want some indian food super bad. Stupid blog.)
3. Attention/Love (it might sound depressing, but it's cause my husband works AND is in school, our marriage is great, I just never see him.
(I chose this picture so I could say...)
4. Speaking of Gerard Butler, I'm pretty sure he could count as a craving. mmmmm. raarrr. (it's okay, John knows, he's okay with it)
5. Dang, now I really just want Indian Food.
What about this? Indian food WHILE cuddling John, watching a Gerard Butler movie and then ice cream for dessert!! All cravings SOLVED! It would be like a happy overload!
1. Ice Cream
(now I want some indian food super bad. Stupid blog.)
3. Attention/Love (it might sound depressing, but it's cause my husband works AND is in school, our marriage is great, I just never see him.
4. Speaking of Gerard Butler, I'm pretty sure he could count as a craving. mmmmm. raarrr. (it's okay, John knows, he's okay with it)
5. Dang, now I really just want Indian Food.
What about this? Indian food WHILE cuddling John, watching a Gerard Butler movie and then ice cream for dessert!! All cravings SOLVED! It would be like a happy overload!
Day 22- What makes you different from everyone else.
I asked John this question. He thought for a minute, and then said, "you married a sexy beast".
Helpful.
Then I said, 'should I say I'm a really good dance?' and he said, "but that's not true, so does that mean that I'm not sexy either?" Now he's worried what I'm typing about him.....
Okay, we've come up with one that we agree works. I pluck my eyebrows in the car. That's right. I. AM. SO. DIFFERENT. Most pluck in the bathroom, but nope, not me. I drive to Lily's school, and sit there and wait. While I'm waiting, I sit and pluck, and hope no one is watching. And if they are...whateves, they're just jealous of my perfectly sculpted eyebrows. For real, I have gotten compliments on my eyebrows.
Helpful.
Then I said, 'should I say I'm a really good dance?' and he said, "but that's not true, so does that mean that I'm not sexy either?" Now he's worried what I'm typing about him.....
Okay, we've come up with one that we agree works. I pluck my eyebrows in the car. That's right. I. AM. SO. DIFFERENT. Most pluck in the bathroom, but nope, not me. I drive to Lily's school, and sit there and wait. While I'm waiting, I sit and pluck, and hope no one is watching. And if they are...whateves, they're just jealous of my perfectly sculpted eyebrows. For real, I have gotten compliments on my eyebrows.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Day 20- If you had 3 wishes, what would they be.
1. Hands down my all time wish would be to be able to find a 3-4 bdrm house that is actually affordable in this stupid town of Flagstaff. (3 kids + 2 bdrms= stress city, especially at night!)
2. That John would be done with school, and be able to arrive home every day, without fail, at 5:15 pm.
3. That I wouldn't have my thyroid problem. This may seem like a waste of a wish to you, but if you read up on thyroid, it effects so much, weight, hormones, extreme fatigue and it is very difficult to live with. I know there are worse diseases out there, but this one is the thorn in my side.
I wanted to say for my #3 that my children would always have easy, struggle free lives. But then I realized that easy lives aren't what creates character and faith. I just hope that I can be there to help them through the 'character' shaping moments.
2. That John would be done with school, and be able to arrive home every day, without fail, at 5:15 pm.
3. That I wouldn't have my thyroid problem. This may seem like a waste of a wish to you, but if you read up on thyroid, it effects so much, weight, hormones, extreme fatigue and it is very difficult to live with. I know there are worse diseases out there, but this one is the thorn in my side.
I wanted to say for my #3 that my children would always have easy, struggle free lives. But then I realized that easy lives aren't what creates character and faith. I just hope that I can be there to help them through the 'character' shaping moments.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Day 19- Nicknames you have & how or why you have them.
Um...I don't really have any nicknames. My father in law calls me Millie, cause he gives EVERYONE a nickname. He even started calling my sister, Geralyn, Jerry after knowing her for like an hour probably.
I AM called Camela, Camelia, Camille, and other annoying things that people say because they don't know how to sound out words.
Boring post.
The End.
I AM called Camela, Camelia, Camille, and other annoying things that people say because they don't know how to sound out words.
Boring post.
The End.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Day 18- Plans/dreams/goals you have.
I PLAN on going to bed early.
I DREAM about living in a house with more than 2 bedrooms (since I have 3 kids and all).
My GOAL is to open a B & B someday with my hubby.
I didn't feel like getting into that one, can you tell? Let me tell you about why I am going to bed early. I am having a rough day. Or maybe a retarded day. When I got home from picking Lily up from school, I pulled into the driveway and got out of the car. The problem is that I didn't turn off the engine or put the car in park. As soon as I got out the car started rolling. It was one of those slow-mo things where you slowly turn your head and are like, "whaaaattt'ssss happpennninngg?" Ya. Awesome. I jumped back in and stopped it, but not before I crashed into the fence a little. Some of the slats on the fence are cracked, but I was able to push the fence back to make it look like it stand upright. I called John to tell him, so that I wouldn't have to tell him how retarded I am to his face. But he was sweet and told me that he's done stuff like that before.
THEN when we were eating dinner, about halfway through, I knocked my plate to the ground. And there goes my taco salad. So I finished Izzy's, and then let the dogs in to eat mine. They did a fantastic job of cleaning it up, so I got over being upset about it.
But I'm still going to bed early.
I DREAM about living in a house with more than 2 bedrooms (since I have 3 kids and all).
My GOAL is to open a B & B someday with my hubby.
I didn't feel like getting into that one, can you tell? Let me tell you about why I am going to bed early. I am having a rough day. Or maybe a retarded day. When I got home from picking Lily up from school, I pulled into the driveway and got out of the car. The problem is that I didn't turn off the engine or put the car in park. As soon as I got out the car started rolling. It was one of those slow-mo things where you slowly turn your head and are like, "whaaaattt'ssss happpennninngg?" Ya. Awesome. I jumped back in and stopped it, but not before I crashed into the fence a little. Some of the slats on the fence are cracked, but I was able to push the fence back to make it look like it stand upright. I called John to tell him, so that I wouldn't have to tell him how retarded I am to his face. But he was sweet and told me that he's done stuff like that before.
THEN when we were eating dinner, about halfway through, I knocked my plate to the ground. And there goes my taco salad. So I finished Izzy's, and then let the dogs in to eat mine. They did a fantastic job of cleaning it up, so I got over being upset about it.
But I'm still going to bed early.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Day 17- Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why.
I would want to switch lives with one of the many people who I think are perfect and have an easy life. The reason is simple: by switching lives with them, I would be able to see that there live ISN'T perfect, and that maybe it's even harder than mine. It would be a good lesson to me to not judge books by there cover.
Day 16- Something you could live without.
I'm sitting her with Lily's head on my shoulder, as she is coming down from one of her sleepwalking fits that she won't remember anything about tomorrow. I could live without THOSE.
These days, I desperately wish to live without these:
As you may or may not know (if you don't know, this must be your first time reading my blog), this has been a CRAPPY sick winter. This winter alone, we have experienced:
1 Mono
2 Pneumonias (yes, you MUST capitalize these sicknesses, because they are a force to be respected)
1 stomach flu
3 Influenza Flus
1 ear infecction
Who KNOWS how many colds that keep us up coughing.
While I'm at it, I might as well throw in 4 baby teeth broken through (almost 5).
These have also added up to:
2 ER visits
3 InstaCare visits
Probably at least TEN Dr. visits
Being sick is super expensive. For Real. Especially Pneumonia. Don't get it, if you do you'll wish you'd listened to me.
These days, I desperately wish to live without these:
As you may or may not know (if you don't know, this must be your first time reading my blog), this has been a CRAPPY sick winter. This winter alone, we have experienced:
1 Mono
2 Pneumonias (yes, you MUST capitalize these sicknesses, because they are a force to be respected)
1 stomach flu
3 Influenza Flus
1 ear infecction
Who KNOWS how many colds that keep us up coughing.
While I'm at it, I might as well throw in 4 baby teeth broken through (almost 5).
These have also added up to:
2 ER visits
3 InstaCare visits
Probably at least TEN Dr. visits
Being sick is super expensive. For Real. Especially Pneumonia. Don't get it, if you do you'll wish you'd listened to me.
Friday, April 8, 2011
Everyone RELAX!
So, I'm totally going to be on a blogging roll yesterday and today. I am sick, with a cold, so I'm sitting around playing on the computer. I have like no immune system it appears.
Anyway, there is something that I was thinking about the other day that I thought might make a good blog post, so I'm going to blog about it, and you might not like it.
I totally realize, just as much as anyone, if not more, how important it is to make sure that we raise out kids right and guard them against the world. With that said, I am going to talk about 2 acquaintances and how they need to relax. We will just call these some of my pet peeves.
Pet Peeve #1:
While at a friends house for a 'play date', another girl was there that I didn't know. Her daughter found a little plastic tea set and brought a cup to her mom. She asked her if she wanted some tea. As LDS, we are not supposed to drink caffeinated tea, so this upset the mother. The mother was telling her, 'why don't we just have some hot chocolate?" And her daughter kept saying 'Tea" and this was clearly upsetting the mother. After the little girl went away, the mother said, "I don't know where she'd even get that, we don't drink tea". I drink tea, and I like it. There is something called HERBAL tea, and it's okay to drink. It can even be good for you. So if you're a Mormon, and your kid wants to have a tea party with pretend tea, so WHAT. Lighten up, not all tea is bad. It's not like she was all, "mom do you want some beer?" I strongly believe in choosing my battles, and this, my friends, is not battle worthy.
Pet Peeve #2 (the biggest):
While babysitting some kids at my house, Izzy said the word, "butt". And one of the kids I was babysitting proceeded to freak out. "We'd don't say butt Izzy, It's a bad word!!". Then she came over to me and told on Izzy. And I told her, "butt isn't a bad word, it's a body part." And she said, "well, it is in MY house so you can't say that word when I'm over here!!". Then I took deep breaths and felt really angry at her attitude, and at her mother for teaching her a body part is a bad word. I am in complete agreement, that you shouldn't CALL someone a butt, but why can't you SAY it? I think that to teach a child that a BODY PART is a bad word is really not good. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that if butt is a bad word, penis and vagina are even worse. In my opinion, teaching kids that butt and other private part words are bad words that you shouldn't say, is teaching them to be ashamed of there body.
When Lily started school, she didn't know the private part words, she didn't know much about sex or anything like that. And I realized that with her now in school, she'd either learn those things from me, or from her peers. So one day something came up that led us into the conversation of what the real names for privates are, and that they are not just called 'privates'. I explained to her that they are words that we don't joke about, because they are words we respect, because we respect our privates.
I am proud that I can have open conversations with my children about this stuff. If I told her that those were 'bad words' and not to say them, she would get the wrong message about them AND i feel like it would close off opportunity to have open conversations about them.
So that is all, probably no one will read through this whole thing, cause it's long, and there are no pictures. I'm pretty sure the people I'm talking about don't read my blog, but if you do I'm sorry to offend. Just realize that my opinions are different. Feel free to blog about how horrible you think I am.
If anyone DID get all the way through this, let me know what you think!
Anyway, there is something that I was thinking about the other day that I thought might make a good blog post, so I'm going to blog about it, and you might not like it.
I totally realize, just as much as anyone, if not more, how important it is to make sure that we raise out kids right and guard them against the world. With that said, I am going to talk about 2 acquaintances and how they need to relax. We will just call these some of my pet peeves.
Pet Peeve #1:
While at a friends house for a 'play date', another girl was there that I didn't know. Her daughter found a little plastic tea set and brought a cup to her mom. She asked her if she wanted some tea. As LDS, we are not supposed to drink caffeinated tea, so this upset the mother. The mother was telling her, 'why don't we just have some hot chocolate?" And her daughter kept saying 'Tea" and this was clearly upsetting the mother. After the little girl went away, the mother said, "I don't know where she'd even get that, we don't drink tea". I drink tea, and I like it. There is something called HERBAL tea, and it's okay to drink. It can even be good for you. So if you're a Mormon, and your kid wants to have a tea party with pretend tea, so WHAT. Lighten up, not all tea is bad. It's not like she was all, "mom do you want some beer?" I strongly believe in choosing my battles, and this, my friends, is not battle worthy.
Pet Peeve #2 (the biggest):
While babysitting some kids at my house, Izzy said the word, "butt". And one of the kids I was babysitting proceeded to freak out. "We'd don't say butt Izzy, It's a bad word!!". Then she came over to me and told on Izzy. And I told her, "butt isn't a bad word, it's a body part." And she said, "well, it is in MY house so you can't say that word when I'm over here!!". Then I took deep breaths and felt really angry at her attitude, and at her mother for teaching her a body part is a bad word. I am in complete agreement, that you shouldn't CALL someone a butt, but why can't you SAY it? I think that to teach a child that a BODY PART is a bad word is really not good. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that if butt is a bad word, penis and vagina are even worse. In my opinion, teaching kids that butt and other private part words are bad words that you shouldn't say, is teaching them to be ashamed of there body.
When Lily started school, she didn't know the private part words, she didn't know much about sex or anything like that. And I realized that with her now in school, she'd either learn those things from me, or from her peers. So one day something came up that led us into the conversation of what the real names for privates are, and that they are not just called 'privates'. I explained to her that they are words that we don't joke about, because they are words we respect, because we respect our privates.
I am proud that I can have open conversations with my children about this stuff. If I told her that those were 'bad words' and not to say them, she would get the wrong message about them AND i feel like it would close off opportunity to have open conversations about them.
So that is all, probably no one will read through this whole thing, cause it's long, and there are no pictures. I'm pretty sure the people I'm talking about don't read my blog, but if you do I'm sorry to offend. Just realize that my opinions are different. Feel free to blog about how horrible you think I am.
If anyone DID get all the way through this, let me know what you think!
Day 15- Put your iPod on shuffle & share the first 10 songs that play.
Let me go find the ipod and see if it's even charged...hooray you are in luck!
1. Fighter- Christina Agulera
2. Toxic- Britany Spears
I'm feeling like a loser that these are my first 2 songs
3. Red Red Wine- I don't know who sings it.
4. Push- Matchbox 20
5. Some song by The Killers
6. Someone New- Heather Nova
7. Don't Lie- Black Eyed Peas
8. Smells Like Teen Spirit- Nrivana
9. You Outta Know - Alanis Morrisette
10. Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me- pussycat dolls
You should know that I haven't ever bought any music to put on my ipod. (clearly) John just has a ton of cd's w/mp3's on them so i went through those and got stuff off of them. That's why it's all old school. lol. The only time I use my ipod is when I run, so it's mostly fast stuff on there. Whateves, I don't have to explain myself to YOU! :)
The End
1. Fighter- Christina Agulera
2. Toxic- Britany Spears
I'm feeling like a loser that these are my first 2 songs
3. Red Red Wine- I don't know who sings it.
4. Push- Matchbox 20
5. Some song by The Killers
6. Someone New- Heather Nova
7. Don't Lie- Black Eyed Peas
8. Smells Like Teen Spirit- Nrivana
9. You Outta Know - Alanis Morrisette
10. Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me- pussycat dolls
You should know that I haven't ever bought any music to put on my ipod. (clearly) John just has a ton of cd's w/mp3's on them so i went through those and got stuff off of them. That's why it's all old school. lol. The only time I use my ipod is when I run, so it's mostly fast stuff on there. Whateves, I don't have to explain myself to YOU! :)
The End
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Day 14- A picture of something you ate and 10 confessions.
2. Sometimes I really love Keeping up with the Kardashians.
3. I sub-consciously believe that if no one sees me eating it, the calories don't count.
4. I think people should mind there own damn business about the number of kids a person wants to have. (sore spot, can you tell?)
5. Sometimes i get REALLY sick of having girls, the pink, the drama, the talking.
6. I have a crush on Eugine/Flynn Rider on Tangled.
7. Sometimes, I think that babies are ugly, even my FRIENDS babies, but I would never say anything. (if you're reading this, I don't mean YOUR baby, but someone elses. Your baby is cute.)
8. I have gotten into the habit of letting Izzy watch too much TV when Lily is gone at school.
9. Last time I made brownies, I ate half the pan in the same night (hour). I didn't even feel bad about it, until John judged me for it.
10. I LOVE throwing things away. When I clean, I really purge. John doesn't like it when I throw stuff away, so I do that when he's at work. Once I threw a way a HUGE HUUUGE stack of his homework assignments that he didn't want to throw out because???? (packrat) And he NEVER noticed.
Day 13- Write a letter telling someone something you could never tell them.
I am cheating today and doing 2 since I don't have any kids around momentarily.
This one seems rather personal, since you are putting it online for anyone to see, even the person you are writing the letter to. Therefore, I think that it is quite dumb. But I will do it anyway.
Dear Dad,
When you raised us in the church to believe in Eternal families, and then left the church, therefore leaving our Eternal family, it felt like I was being betrayed. It still hurts.
Love,
Your daughter
This one seems rather personal, since you are putting it online for anyone to see, even the person you are writing the letter to. Therefore, I think that it is quite dumb. But I will do it anyway.
Dear Dad,
When you raised us in the church to believe in Eternal families, and then left the church, therefore leaving our Eternal family, it felt like I was being betrayed. It still hurts.
Love,
Your daughter
Day 12- A picture of your room & don’t cheat by cleaning it. Share a secret.
Why do I have to share a secret? Hmmmm. It had better be juicy since my bedroom pics are so lame. I don't think I HAVE any secrets, especially juicy ones. Sorry peeps, I've got NOTHING. I've been sitting here for a while thinking, and nothing.
How about, when I was little, my and my friend would pee in the corner of the racket ball courts because if we went to my house to use the bathroom, my mom would make me stay home. Juicy enough for you? lol.
the end.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Day 11-A picture of something you dislike.
I was actually going to do this yesterday, but I really couldn't think of anything original that I disliked at that time. Sure, everyone dislikes messy houses, crying babies, tantrums...skinny girls. But what was something I disliked that made me different than everyone else? I went to bed feeling baffled. When I woke up this morning, the kids were watching cartoons.....
Problem Solved.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Day 10- A story about a past relationship.
Ugh.
I've had lots of relationships, but can't think of any good stories.
Once I had a boyfriend cheat on me, once I cheated on a boyfriend (what? it's high school, big deal), and once I sent a missionary away and Dear Johned him, WITH a John. I never promised I'd wait though, that's silly.
I've had lots of relationships, but can't think of any good stories.
Once I had a boyfriend cheat on me, once I cheated on a boyfriend (what? it's high school, big deal), and once I sent a missionary away and Dear Johned him, WITH a John. I never promised I'd wait though, that's silly.
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Day 09- Something/someone you’re proud of.
I am very proud of my happy little family. When I'm in town, I always get comments about how well behaved they are, and how beautiful they are. They are fabulous little girls who love to help and make us proud of them. I don't feel like we are exceptional parents in anyway, we just lucked out and got exceptional kids.
The End
(One thing you will learn about me, is that I am not long winded)
The End
(One thing you will learn about me, is that I am not long winded)
Friday, April 1, 2011
Day 08- Short term goals for this month and why.
This is the perfect one for today since it's the first of a month!
Stop nursing. Maya turned 1 on March 9th. (didn't blog about it, cause I was dying) When I am done nursing, I am planning on doing the HCG diet. After Izzy, I could run up to 4 miles a day, and lose nothing. It took me A YEAR to lost TEN LBS. Not cool. So this time around I have no working out motivation, so I haven't really gotten back into it. I feel like if I can just LOSE the weight, I totally live a lifestyle to where I can KEEP it off.
Start up with hobbies again. That whole post about what your hobbies are really left me feeling very bad about myself. I really don't have any hobbies or anything for ME that I'm involved in right now, and that has to change!
That's about it that I can think of right now. I am still on orders from my doctor to take it easy. Did you know it takes like 6 WEEKS to recover from pneumonia. It's been 3, and I am still exhausted. Lame.
Stop nursing. Maya turned 1 on March 9th. (didn't blog about it, cause I was dying) When I am done nursing, I am planning on doing the HCG diet. After Izzy, I could run up to 4 miles a day, and lose nothing. It took me A YEAR to lost TEN LBS. Not cool. So this time around I have no working out motivation, so I haven't really gotten back into it. I feel like if I can just LOSE the weight, I totally live a lifestyle to where I can KEEP it off.
Start up with hobbies again. That whole post about what your hobbies are really left me feeling very bad about myself. I really don't have any hobbies or anything for ME that I'm involved in right now, and that has to change!
That's about it that I can think of right now. I am still on orders from my doctor to take it easy. Did you know it takes like 6 WEEKS to recover from pneumonia. It's been 3, and I am still exhausted. Lame.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)